Beauty is Pain

Okay so today I went to get my eyebrows and lip waxed...something I hate to do but know I have to because if I don't I feel like how Julie Andrews describes Anne Hathaway for having bushman eyebrows. But I know what I have to do. So I went and OW! When I sat up to look at my brows I had to wipe a tear away and the woman asked me if I was all right. I said "yes" but I really wanted to be like "no I hate this". But I didn't want to say that, that would be mean.

I do remember the time my mom first took me to get my eye brows waxed and it was the first time I wanted to yell the F word. I don't like pain. I guess minus a few minor things I have never experienced pain, I have yet to break my arm or really any bone and I haven't given birth to a child. I guess I have little to compare a waxing too.

I know my mom, and sister and any other woman who is reading this that has given birth is probably laughing because I complain abotu the pain of my eye brow waxing and giving birth as my mom told me is like "pushing a turkey through your nose." (Yeah can't wait for that).

Any way maybe a woman can tell me why we go through this. I know we have to, to make ourselves look beautiful but I want to know why. For thousands of years women didn't wax, didn't shave and yet I read history books and they describe women as beautiful. Anne Boyelyn's beauty was suppose to have captured King Henry's heart but yet I bet she never waxed her eye brows. Maybe I should do some research into women's beautification systems. I do like fashion history so this is not that far away from that.

So some one needs to fill me in on this?

Just re-read this posting and thought about how during my senior year of college I studied about the corset and the what pain and restrictions it did to the body and I'd rather get my eye brows waxed then wear a corset. I guess compartively we girls in the 21st century have it easier than other centuries so I should not complain too much.

Pardon my oh so random rant.

Bright Star

I just watched the movie Bright Star the movie about the love between John Keats and Fanny Brawne. To start off I will say that I did not know much about Keats when I first watched this movie, I knew he was suppose to be the key Romantic English Poet. Besides that I knew this movie got lots of rave reviews about fashion and the impact it had on the spring fashion.

Did you see big collars or funky hats? I don't remember.

But I did like seeing Fanny Brawne's color and flair. Usually in period films of this era you see lots of whites and browns. My mom said that was the case because white showed a girls purity (like wearing white dresses for a bride) and color dyes were expensive. I could not tell if Fanny was rich but she seemed comfortable.

But the story is about the love between John Keats who is poor and can not marry. Or if he did marry he would have to work and would not be able to write, as his friend (Mr. Brown- a character I did not understand) reminded him. He also knew he could not support her. But yet the heart does not think of the pocket book.

The Article on Wikipedia was really good for the plot.

Though Fanny's flirtatious personality contrasts with Keats's notably more aloof nature, she begins to pursue him after she has her siblings, Samuel and Toots, obtain his book of poetry "Endymion". Despite her efforts to interact with the poet it is only after witnessing her grief for the loss of his brother Tom that Keats begins to open up to Fanny's advances, where he spends Christmas with the Brawne family. After Keats begins to give poetry less

ons to Fanny it becomes apparent that their attraction is mutual, however Fanny is nevertheless troubled in regards to Keats's reluctance to pursue her, for which her mother (Kerry Fox) summarizes, "Mr Keats knows he cannot like you, he has no living and no income".

It is only after Fanny receives a valentine from Brown that Keats passionately confronts them and wonders if they are lovers. Brown, who sent the valentine in jest, warns Keats of Fanny, claiming that she is a mere flirt playing a game. On the other hand, Fanny, hurt by the

accusations and Keats's lack of faith in her, ends their lessons and leaves. It isn't until after the Dilkes move to Westminster that spring, leaving the Brawne family six months half rent in their home neighboring Brown, that Fanny and Keats resume their interaction and fall deeply in love. The relationship comes to an abrupt end, however, after Brown leaves for his summer rental with Keats, so that Keats may earn some money. Though Fanny is heartbroken, she is comforted by Keats's love letters. When the men return in the autumn, Fanny's mother shows concern, feeling that Fanny's attachment with the poet will hinder her from being courted. Secretly,

however, Fanny and Keats are engaged.

Sadly it does not end well for the couple and maybe if I knew more about Keats I would have known that. But if you are just watching the movie for the great fashion it it worth it. I loved the costuming and the color not just in the fabric but in the scenes. It was a lot brighter and not has harsh as the other Jane Campion film I saw in a Women Studies Class The Piano.

I liked this picture a lot because when I saw it I thought of my character, Emmy, reading in the field.

The Introduction

Emmy didn’t know Julia’s true feelings on her up coming visit and looked forward to seeing her cousin come again. Julia had wrote to Emmy about the gossip of Boston but she always wrote saying “I’ll tell you more when I see you.” At last her arrival would end the mystery of who Francis Jackson would marry. It gave Emmy such delight to discuss the people as they were characters in a novel and though she had never met them she them she tried to to imagine their future if she just changed one element of their lives.

Though Emmy craved adventure in her stories and maybe one day in her life. She knew she could not be without there mother, her sisters and her woods but wondered what it would be like to live like her cousin Julia, a young lady in society full of a town’s juicy stories. Always entertaining suitors and going to fancy parties to dance the night away.

“When you are old enough I’ll let you go to Boston.” Fiona would say when Emmy moaned about going to Boston.

“But Julia is only a year older than me and already been presented. Oh mother could I not go to Boston.”

“You will,” her mother kissed her on the fore head.

What her mother meant by “you will” was one day “when I see fit.” Emmy could tell with the tone she used. Emmy also knew it was a bad idea to push on the issue further for the time being. What Emmy really didn’t understand is why Laurel never talked about going to Boston it was if it was the worst idea ever. Surely in Boston Laurel would be the bell of the ball her look were far better than Julia’s and people would not judge her for being poor; she thought they would assume a cousin to the Danfords would be just a rich as they. But Laurel had no interest in leaving her mother or their house. She also seemed to care little for the fact that her cousins were coming and they were bringing a friend of Nicholas’, Ethan Foster, a class mate of Nicholas and a man growing in Uncle Charles’s firm from England and could not return home for the short season. And Emmy seemed to be the only one who found that interesting.

Grandma Danford’s health was almost renewed by the time Uncle Charles arrival came. She even made her way to the foyer to greet them but she thought the air would be too cold to wait for them outside. Emmy thought it was the most pleasant day they had had all season so far and ran to keep a look out. When she saw their convoy she ran back inside and announced their arrival.

“Heavens sake no yelling is necessary.”

“I am sorry Grandma,” Emmy lowered her tone.

“I would hardly call it dignified, maybe a summer with a lady of society like your cousin would be good. But I do hope you act better with your guest.”

“I am sure that is the last yell you will hear from Emmy,” Fiona said.

“I do hope so. Really Fiona if your girls should know how to behave, Laurel is good but if your relaxed ways continue Gloria will be a disgrace.”

“Emmy will behave just fine.”

“I do hope so we can not have our family disgraced.”

Emmy thought she was behaving just fine by not refuting any of her Grandma Danford’s words. And later her mother would thank her for it.

“Mr. and Mrs. Charles Danford,” Thomas said.

“Thank you Thomas,” Charles said patting him on the back.

“Your welcome sir.”

“Mother,” Charles walked in and kissed Grandma Danford’s out stretched hand. “You look more beautiful every time.”

“You are sweet but you are already the heir to my fortune.”

“Mother Danford,”Victoria said greeting Grandma Danford also with a kiss on the hand but she seemed more uncomfortable in the behavior.

“Where are the children?”

“Coming, Nick’s friend Ethan was following and I think they got separated,” Victoria said.

“What kind of driver loses another driver.”

“Ethan Foster, doesn’t have a driver mother,” Uncle Charles said.

“What?”

“Not everyone feels the need for a driver,” Victoria said sweetly.

“They should.”

“Mother, young people are more adventurous these days,” Uncle Danford said trying to laugh it off.

“Not another adventurous spirit in this house,” Grandma Danford said giving Emmy a harsh look that no one but Emmy noticed. However no one missed her next sentiment. “I have my hands full with no adventurous youth and I do hope Victoria your daughter Julia, so refined will be a good influence over her.”

Emmy looked over to Aunt Victoria she looked more embarrassed than Emmy felt. Emmy didn’t know why, what did she have to be embarrassed about her daughter was the talk of Boston for being a refined delight. Emmy couldn’t think of any one who would consider the Cromwell girls as refined delight. Laurel would definitely be considered refined and maybe in some circles Emmy would be considered delightful. Even as Emmy thought of the word as an adjective next to he name, she thought it would be use liberally as no one would dare speak ill of some one related to Mrs. Cornelia Danford. Emmy thought the word that would probably be used to describe her would be childish. One can not be childish and refined at the same time and no heroine in her own right would stand to be thought of as childish. Maybe Grandma Danford was right spending the summer with Julia would do Emmy good, Emmy thought.

These thought were broken by Thomas announcing Nicholas and Julia.

“Grandma Danford,” Nick said grandly sweeping into the parlor “may I present my good friend Ethan Foster from Harvard by way of Sussex.”

“Aw the man who has no driver.”

“Yes mam,” he said with a nod. “The drive is more enjoyable when one experienced every bump behind the wheel.”

Two things were certain, one he had a British accent and second he spoke his mind. Both were so refreshing, Emmy thought. No was to speak their mind in front of Grandma Danford, and no did minus this stranger.

I'm a Blogger

I will say loud and proud I have become a blogger. I love this blog even though I am not sure how many people read it or how many people care about my opinions on maybe silly stuff but I don't care I just like writing this and getting my thought out there and I LOVE when people comment or when some one writes on my facebook wall about my blog or even yesterday a co-worker asked me about the movies I saw because she saw on my blog I wrote about them. I LOVE IT! I think about this blog- like what to say, or what to add to it or what do I want to write about next. I also look forward to my weekends so I can work on my story and post it on my blog. I spend time looking for pictures on Google Image to portray what I am talking about and I love when I find a quote and it inspires a free write. Maybe I am a bit crazy.

So first I want to say thank you to my loyal readers. I want to thank my sister who called me out in March and said I don't write enough and she loyaly follows my blog. I want to thank my Grandpa who reads it and then writes encouraging notes to me on Facebook... my Grandpa is so high tech. I want to thank my co-worker who gave me a shout out at a meeting for being creative. And I want to thank all my supporters who have read or listened to my writing and for supporitng me. I love the support.

You guys really are the reason I keep writing, even if no one reads it.

Second, I want to say I have always wanted to be a writer. I love writing. My mom can attest to how many notebooks I writing probably little stories that never went any where. I had a few poems published in my high school literary magazine, they probably weren't that good but it helped to have friends who worked for the magazine. But I loved seeing my name getting a by line. Writing has just been my oasis when school, work or life just got to hectic I love to pull out a journal and write a story. I have always started writing my stories in notebooks or paper I found I can't sit at a computer and stare at a blank word page and write (I wish sometime I could my hand really cramps up after writing for hours by hand). In my summer class I learned the expression "Desktop Publisher" it came out in the 80's or early 90's when people were getting their own PCs and wrting their own words and distributing just by hitting the print button. I know I am an 80's baby because I can't remember a time not having a computer. My Grandpa brought macs to TCU (if I have the story right) and when they got new computers he would give us an old one. I remember having one computer in my play closet, that was lots of fun and I guess I owe it to my Grandpa for letting me be a desk top publisher. But I guess through my Blog I am a desk top writer because even though I don't know how many people read my blog my writing rather it be a random blog post like this or part of my story (Sisters of Pinehaven, working title) people are reading it and it it is out there for the world to see. One day I would like to be an actual published author with a book on shelf that you can buy at Barnes and Nobles or maybe an independent book store. But until then I will keep writing this blog and hoping you readers will keep reading. THANK YOU!


Lastly, listen to your own thoughts and feelings very carefully, be aware of your observations, and learn to value them. When you're a teenager – and even when you're older – lots of people will try to tell you what to think and feel. Try to stand still inside all of that and hear your own voice. It's yours and only yours, it's unique and worthy of your attention, and if you cultivate it properly, it might just make you a writer. -Jennifer Donnelly