Another One for my Grandma

After my last post, my Grandma passed away on Friday June 3rd. A lot of people have said they are sorry for my loss. I know my Grandma is in heaven so I am not sad about losing her because she is no longer in pain and she now is with the Lord forever. I am sorry that I didn't know her better. She was such a wonderful woman full of love.

We buried my Grandma Wednesday June 8th and that day I bought a bracelet with a heart on it to remind me of the love my Grandma had for me, their family and the Lord. This is true for all my Grandmas (Nana, Mema, Grandma) who have left this earth to be with their heavenly father. I hope one day to be as loving, thoughtful, generous, merciful, and graceful as all these women were. Their hearts were always open and that is what I would like to one day be said about me.

Below is a song my cousins sang at her funeral and it made me cry with how beautiful the song is and how beautifully true it is for my Grandma.

Dancing with the Angels.
by Monk & Neagle

Memories surround me
But sadness has found me
I'd do anything for more time
Never before has someone meant more
And I can't get you out of my mind

There is so much that I don't understand
But I know...

You're dancing with the angels
Walking in new life
You're dancing with the angels
Heaven fills your eyes
Now that you're dancing with the angels

You had love for your family
Love for all people
Love for the Father, and Son
Your heart will be heard
In your unspoken words
Through generations to come

There is so much that I don't understand
But I know

You're dancing with the angels
Walking in new life
You're dancing with the angels
Heaven fills your eyes
Now that you're dancing with the angels

We're only here for such a short time
So I'm gonna' stand up, shout out,
And sing Hallelujah
One day I'll see you again

You're dancing with the angels
Walking in new life
You're dancing with the angels
Heaven fills your eyes
Now that you're dancing with the angels

I know this blog is suppose to be about the stories I am writting (and some of it will be) but I also wanted to keep you informed of my life. I know my family is all over the country and while reading a blog is not so personal as seeing all of you I wanted to share not only my fictional writing but also the writings of my own life.

Hope you enjoy.

Thinking about Grandma

This not really following my story...

I am sitting at my desk not really thinking about work because half way across the countrymy Grandma is laying in her nursing home bed and waiting for the Lord to take her up to heaven. She has been sick for awhile and the doctors have told us any time now. Today my dad called me saying the doctors have told them it will probably be today then he texted me an hour later saying there was slight improvement but I am not really sure what that means. I wish I was in Wichita, KS with her and with my family instead of in Boston feeling somewhat a lone in all this as I wait anxiously for my phone to ring. I really want to get on the next flight out of Boston and be with everyone but then again I think, I have a slight pile of paper work to do at my job and if I went to Kansas being there wouldn't magically slove anything. My Grandma is 89 years old and wants to be in heaven with the Lord and with her husband, my Granddad who passed away in October. So I am now doing the logical thing and trying to live a normal life while my heart and brain are in Kansas.

My Grandma was born in 1922, she lived through the dust bowl on a farm outside of Liberal, KS under the dark brown spot on the map in Eastern Kansas. She lived through the depression and World War II. She married her college sweet heart, my Granddad, and they were married for 67 years and in those 67 years she was a devoted wife and mother raising 3 sons and 1 daughter. She is also a devoted Grandma having fourteen grandchildren and twelve great grand children all of who felt her warm and tender heart. I know when we arrived at her house I always looked forward to getting my kiss on the cheek when I came through the door. To me she will always be one of the most perfect women on the face of the earth.

As a future archivist and a want to be author. I love that she has kept all her journals and notebooks from when she was younger. She also has kept all her family and our family's photo albums neatly organized. I would love to one day be able to explore her world a little bit more. I sit here and think about all she has seen in her life time. From only a few people having telephones to every one having cell phone. From no computers to computers being as small as a notebook binder (if not smaller). Thinking of all the history that has taken place in her life time The Great Depression, WWII, The Civil Rights movement, going to outer space, the Cold War, the Berlin Wall falling, 9/11 and everything I have missed. She may not be famous outside of her family and friends but she has experienced a lot.

As a want to be writer my imagination is trying to imagine what her life must have been like. For some reason it keeps going to this image of a young women standing in 194os style dress. Looking at google image the dresses seem to be like our modern day blouse dresses. And I know the picture on the right is not my Grandma and its a modern day picture it caputers the essence of what I am thinking.


I see a woman standing in a field of sunflowers, in a plain style dress her hair has been stylishly pulled up but has come lose from her hard days work. She stands with a letter from the love of her life with only the gentel summer breeze to comfort her. And then she hears her mother's dinner call in the distance and as she wipes the tears away she tries to breathe so no one notices her pain.


I don't think that ever happened to my Grandmother but some how I come back to this image in my head. I guess since I am reading a book about WWII my mind is more intrigued to think about this time period. But from a historical point of view and from my Grandma's point of view I know little about this time frame so my mind is just left with this image. Maybe one day I can come back to this woman in my mind and explore her world.

Thank you for reading my little tangent. I have actually found calmness in imagining what my Grandma's world would be like and then letting my imagination run down its own little path