Happy belated New Years... time to move on.

 Happy New Years!

Sorry I am writing that a bit late... but better late than never right?


Yes!
That is Benedict Cumberbatch in the background.

I have been on visiting family for Christmas and I have not looked at my computer. I went to Oklahoma to see my Dad's family and for a few days there were 5 children under 5... needles to say it very chaotic and loud at points but also wonderful. Then I went to visit my mom's house (in Southern California) and enjoyed some relaxation and sun. I also got to attend the Palm Springs International Film Gala (and thanks to my step-dad's connections got to stand with the press and see some stars up close)...probably the highlight of 2015. Besides Benedict Cumberbatch, I got to see Allen Leech (Tom Branson from Downton), Eddie Redmayne (Les Mis, Theory of Everything), Reese Witherspoon, Steve Carell, Patrick Stewart, Julianne Moore and many others. It was a great night...one I hope to never forget.

Left to right: Patrick Stewart, Eddie Redmayne, Allen Leech, Reese Witherspoon
Steve Carell. 

But now I am back in cold Boston. I am done with grad school (odd to say and realize) and will have to soon face the reality of looking for a real "adult" job... However, there are some things I would like to accomplish in 2015. In my "looking back thinking ahead" post I wrote I want to:

"1) Invest or re-invest in the friendships I have"... Last semester I was felt very isolated, I mean minus my roommate and cat I really didn't feel to be connected to anyone. I haven't gone to community group (or Bible study) in months and I think that drained me a bit. I tried to keep up with friends but it was an effort and I didn't like the feeling of "scheduling" fun time. But I had too.

Pics from night of celebrating... in December

So happy to celebrate end of thesis

"2)Work on transforming my mind in order to understand God's purpose in my life"... I am not sure how I am going to this. I think going back to Bible study will help, even just to pull me out of thinking only about myself. Also making quiet time a priority... I usually do it first thing in the morning while enjoying a cup of coffee but sometimes I feel it makes little impact on the rest of my day.

At church on Sunday we are going through a series called Fray about about how our lives have been torn because of our separation from God. It also has a little bit of typical New Years Resolution. For example last week they talked about "diets and health" but how we make we can make the strive for dieting and health our idol (I missed that week but I got the gist). This week had been about relationships and how we have gotten distracted from what we really matter. I know I fall pray to this A LOT. Beyond relationships I say I want to write more but after work I come home and I watch mindless television. I keep saying I want to change but I feel stuck a lot of the time... I don't think it has to do with just being done with grad-school.

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I have noticed in my life that sometimes when things come along that are challenging instead of taking on the challenge I just give up. I know my mom will read this and remind me that I have written a thesis, moved across country, and other things. And I know those details too but sometimes I feel I give up to easily. I mean I can't ride a bike because it was too hard to ride without training wheels and not that is a huge regret but I feel sometime scared by other moments and other situations I have walked away from because they are just too hard and I sit back and think if I had just tried a little harder would things have been differently? I know lots of people sit back and reflect on their lives and see if there was a point in which things could have changed, especially at this time of the year when we have the whole year in front of us to make changes, to set goals, to feel we can accomplish things we didn't do last year.

One thing my pastor said is a lot of times we tell ourselves "when I do this then I can do this" the example he gave is "when I graduate then I will be able to do ___(fill in blank)___." I have probably said this more than a few times even if not out loud. I have written here that have felt stuck in grad-school waiting for my life to begin. Well now it can begin. Not only is this a new year it is a new time in my life. I don't have to keep putting my life on hold because of school and it feels awesome. I want to do things with my life... I want to begin on making a difference in the world around me. I am not for sure what that looks like, I have though about doing some volunteer work or something. I just know I don't want to be writing a post on Jan. 13, 2016 looking back with regrets wishing I had done something, or wishing I hadn't said that thing I said. I want my 2015 to mean something.

So there you go that is my resolution for 2015, for it to mean something. I will keep you posted on the journey.

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