So my story begins...

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My life begins with a letter. Maybe I should say my life changed with a letter since I received the letter when I was twenty-three. My new life began with a letter.

My dearest hope,

If you doubt the words I spoke to you the other night, don't. I have made you the promise of my love and my devotion forever.

I have ordered us a simple state room on the Northern Star Liner, it leaves from Liverpool on Monday and we will sail to New York as man and wife. No one can stop us not even the King, I promise. If you love me meet me at the Euston Station for the 6:15 AM train to Liverpool. I will be waiting to take you into my arms and away from all things long ago. 

Believe me when I say, all my love,

K

So begins my story...

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Somewhere I was told an author does not to share your work. It might have been when Norman Mailer was on Gilmore Girls and was talking to a reporter (picture above). He said he never talked about his work. I don't understand this. I mean I know I am not a real author and by that I mean I am not published (minus this blog). I don't know how not to share my writing... I love it so much and when you love something you want to share it. I mean If you follow me on pinterest you will see my love of Downton Abbey, Jane Austen, and other things. So why can't I share my writing? Besides this blog might be the only way I am ever published. I used to blog my story, the Sisters of Pine Haven, and it kept me motivated to finish. Then my friend told me a publisher would not touch my story if I kept it open for the public (that makes sense so I limited who could see the blog). Though I still long to share my writing. If I should never get published at least I would know the blogging world would see my story and know my passion. So I don't know what is better...

My new story starts in 1906, goes through WWI and then ends in the 1920's. The scene I shared is Kelby Gray (my hero) promising to take Esther Harrington (my heroine) away from their past. Then the story flashes back to summer of 1906 when the kids still have very idealistic views of the world but that all the ideals come crashing down during WWI. Marcus Harrington (oldest brother) is eager to fight but his father doesn't want him to go so he has to run away to join the military. Marcus' best friend Shane Gray comes with him and together they join up. After Shane is shot Marcus becomes a shell of his former self and is sent back home. Not long after the news of Shane's death Daphne (Esther's sister) marries Parker Welford (Lord Welford's son). This shocks Esther because she always knew Daphne loved Shane. This marriage pleases her mother as she knows it is good security. Some where in this Esther and Kelby fall in love which is not at all good because Kelby is the son of Lord Welford's cook and mother finds out. So now her mother sends her to London to stay with Daphne and Parker. In this time her mother promises Esther's hand to Lord Welford (Parker's father). Kelby and Esther know the only way they can be together is if they run away.

This is a story I have been playing through my head for a year or so and I really hope to finish this story. I have this brief outline but I am excited to see where the characters take me.

Found these images on Pinterest and thought they would be good settings for my story... 

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Southerton Greens... The Harrington's home

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Cranton Court... Lord Welford's home

Even if you guys don't know it this blog was a big support for me to finish my last story, which was a huge accomplishment for me. (It just needs to be edited and published... but I am working on it). So I wanted to share the starting point of this story. 

Thanks for your support. 

Starting over

Before you read this post read Note to Readers

My dear Anne,

So my dearest Anne, first of all let me tell you some things about myself. I am in grad-school and it is my last "traditional" semester of Grad school and in the fall I will be writing my thesis and doing a long internship. I am looking forward to doing research (as I actually find it fun) but I feel like I am trudging through this semester. It is like grad school senioritis. I'd rather be doing anything but my homework. Actually what I want to be doing is writing my own stories. I sometimes wished I had pursued creative writing instead... though maybe if I had pursued it in school I would not like it so much. Writing is my escape... but right now I feel like I want to escape a lot. Not that anything is seriously going on, I just don't want to be doing school work. I know school will soon be over and I will be able to write and read whatever I want (oh what a glorious day that will be).

Glorious
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Some other things about me that you should know are my obsessions. If you want to get close to me you should know I get very passionate and hold somethings close to my heart. I love being an aunt and probably might have a little unhealthy addicted to my niece and nephew. I don't think it is unhealthy but I am sure my friends/co-workers who I talk to do.

Some time being an auntie over Christmas

I am also a hopeful romantic. I not only love love stories but I have idealistic views of the ideas of chivalry and  men purely pursuing a woman. I think in that I have a deep love of historical fictions. I get very swept in the idealistic view I have of the past. As I mentioned in my post below I just love the idea of wearing fancy dresses, going to balls, and attending eloquent dinners. I think I want to crawl inside and live in a Jane Austen novel or Downton Abbey. Of course having read Confessions of a Jane Austen Addict... I know it is not so glamorous as  I think. Also Mary Crawley talked about how women don't have a life and that they are just stuck in the waiting room for marriage. So maybe the past is not as great as I imagine it to be but I still hold this idealistic view of the ages gone by.

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Sometimes I think if I were to be a character in a Jane Austen or Downton Abbey-ish story I would think I would be an Edith (but nicer) or an Anne Elliot from Persuasion (maybe that is where I got your name). I am the middle daughter with both sisters married and I the useful aunt. I feel that is a role I could do well... if I wasn't a 1,000 miles away from my niece and nephew. I have tried writing a story like that but it seemed "too woe is me" so I didn't want to continue it. I think I am Elinor but I want the passion of Marianne but heck if I could get a man like Dan Stevens to marry me that would be great.

Dan Stevens as Edward Ferras
in the A&E version of Sense and Sensibility
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I do think it is quite obvious that I have a love for the idea of love. As Carrie Bradshaw once said "a deep consuming, can't live with out you love" and that is what I seek after. So I will probably fill my letters with my hopeful romantic ideals and all that is entailed in that.

Besides my niece/nephew, grad-school, and my romantic ideals I will also use this time to write about my faith. To fill you in lately I have felt somewhat of a void in my life with grad-school, going home for Christmas and then having my mom visiting I could cover it up but then when things slowed down a bit I felt empty. As much as I felt I was keeping God in my life somehow I had floated away from Him. I don't think I was letting Him in to the real stuff and keeping our relationship at a very surface level. I am also trying to keep remind myself that no matter how I feel He is here with me. To do this I am trying to memorize scripture I did not do so well last week so my verse is the same...

Find rest, O my soul, in God alone;
my hope comes from him.
 He alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
My salvation and my honor depend on God;
he is my mighty rock, my refuge.
Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your hearts to him,
for God is our refuge.

-Psalm 62:5-8 (NIV 1984).

I think this has been a pretty good letter so I will let you go. Thank you for reading my letter Anne. Please write and tell me how you are doing.

Yours,

Blaire

P.S. I will write more and share with how my writing is coming along. Sharing my writing with you on my last story kept me quite motivated in finishing it. Thank you for your support.

Note to readers

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Dear Readers,

I don't know who is actually reading my blog... but I am changing it. I have decided to write fictitious letters to a girl name Anne whenever I want to write about my life. I do not know why I decided to name my character Anne. But I have decided I have wanted to change my blog around a bit so now all my "Dear Readers" post I will write write to this Anne character. In some ways it seems more personal. I don't know if this makes sense but last night instead of falling asleep I was thinking about this blog and how I want to make it more personal more about my life and not just fluff (as I feel it has become). As I was thinking about it an idea came to my head that I should write these as letters. I have tried to be a pen pal once and I love the idea of writing long handed letters but it didn't last long. So I want to write letters. But instead of writing letters to this unknown group of readers(as I am not exactly sure who reads this) I decided to name my readers Anne. I don't think actually know any person named Anne so I am not writing to anyone in particular.

Hope you enjoy the letters,
Blaire

My first letter to Anne {click here}

Fictional Obsession and Confession

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Dear Readers,

I will admit I get emotionally attached to fictional characters. If you can relate please let me know if  because sometimes I feel alone in my obsessions. For example I get overly happy every time I watch Emma and the scene where Mr. Knightley proposes to Emma and she says "Now I need not call you Mr. Knightley, I can call you my Mr. Knightley." Oh it just tugs at my heart strings. And I lost it when Matthew proposed to Mary on Downton Abbey.

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While yes I do like happy endings and I am totally a hopeful romantic. I look to these books/movies/shows as a way of escapism. I like the idea of getting lost in fancy gowns, balls, and I guess my idealistic view of chivalry. I think that is why I got into history, I wanted to escape into the past and live in the times and places I could only live in my imagination. 

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But it is not just historical stories I mean when Peeta confessed his love for Katniss I hugged the book to my chest because I was so happy. And today when I watched the newest episode of The Lizzie Bennet Diaries I cried... Maybe I am just super emotional. 

I guess I just love getting lost in stories. I hope to one day be an author that writes stories that people will get lost in and will fall hopelessly in love with my characters. I mean I get lost in my own stories but sometimes I think they exist better in my head. (Is this common for writers?)

Any way I just wanted to share my obsession. Hope you, my lovely readers, will understand my posts when all I want to do is escape the realities of grad-school.   

Just a pretty picture of escapism
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