Showing posts with label blogs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label blogs. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

NaNoWriMo... check in #3

Hello Lovely Readers,

Frequently how my writing looked
I just wanted to let you know I did not get to 50,000 words for NaNoWriMo and I am okay with that. Before I started this challenge I read some bloggers about how they survived NaNoWriMo and it seemed to me they had no social life and were hanging on to sanity by a thread (okay I might be exaggerating) but I didn't want that to be me so I told myself "what ever I get done, I get done." I said this because I just wanted to focus on my writing this month and it was my first time doing this challenge. Also I still wanted to keep a life...though I'm sure my roommate felt a bit neglected sometimes (sorry).

For this month I set myself little goals, one to type up whatever I have already written out and two to work through some scenes that I was struggling with. I am happy to say I accomplished those goals.

Working through some scenes was hard because I felt mentally blocked and sometimes I would have to tear pages out of my notebook and try again. My mom once told me "crazy is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." I think I went crazy sometimes because I would try over and over rewriting and reworking scenes and even though the words were the same I expected the outcome to be different. I might be a naive writer but I think as a writer you have to do this.

The following scene (set in 1915 between Mattie and Kelby) I think took me five tries to write out before I felt the flow fit into my story:

"Why do men think they can only prove their worth by fighting. I do not think there is a woman alive who thinks in such a way."
"It is is is in our blood, it comes from being cavemen and hunters and gatherers, always fighting to protect our loved ones and resources,"
"Do you really think this war is about resources?"
"No but it is to protect the ones we love," he discreetly rubbed his thumb over the top of her hand.
"You are not going to go are you?"
"Not yet," he pulled back at truth of that statement. He didn't want to go, first he couldn't leave his mother alone with Shane already fighting and second he had no interest in killing men when he was more interested in healing them. However, he knew if war went on much longer he might be recruited, he was of age and in good health.

{Mattie}
"Promise me Kelby, promise me you won't go until its absolutely necessary." Mattie had just read Marcus was going to training camp to lose Kelby would be to much.
 "Absolutely necessary, I promise," he took her hand in hers and kissed the inside palm.

"Please Lord don't take him from me as well." Mattie looked into Kelby's eyes and she saw them living a long life together, but maybe that is just what she had wanted to see.

"Now it is a beautiful day, the first in a long while let us not waste it by worrying about a future we cannot know. Do you care for a ride? We can get a nice long one in before sunset, besides we must keep these horses in full form in case they are called for active duty." Kelby tried to make light of the situation but anyone who truly knew him know how it had tore his hear to lose a horse. Last month the army came for Clemson, a horse he had raised since a colt, and that had left Kelby a bit distraught.

Mattie eagerly agreed to the ride, she couldn't remember the last she had been on a horse. The country had been at war for eight months and while the paper was full of half truths and inaccurate numbers, the truth from the front lines were slowly being felt. Everyday they were told they had to make sacrifices for some that meant sugar and for others that meant sons. Any moment that felt similar to the past was a glorious feeling. The sun was so bright and welcoming, it warmed her cheeks and brightened her spirits. She was happy to put away any thoughts of Shane at the front, soon Marcus going to war, and she wanted to believe Kelby would never join them. The felicity of the ride and the beauty of the day made it hard to imagine men were being killed by the hundred in an area of Ypres, not more than six hundred kilometers away.

No one between Cranston and Southerton could imagine the horrors that the Germans were releasing on allied men. The men were praying that their day of battle would soon be over with the setting sun only had new weapon to face. A poison gas floated through the air over no mans land sinking into the trenches that were suppose to protect them from bullets and artillery was now the death of them. The pale yellow toxin burned their eyes, stung their throats, and left them suffocating for air. If they lived through that they suffered severe headaches and feeling lightheaded making them seek comfort on the ground only to breath in more gas. The men who could breath at all was jerky and shallow at best and they would climb out of the trenches against orders but in instinct to survive only to be gunned down by awaiting machine guns. "Its a death trap!" the men yelled as they retreated to a better spot. 
{Poisonous Gas}
I know this scene will need to be edited more but I was so proud of myself for writing a battle scene especially since I have not been battle or in a trench.

So while I did not get to 50,000 words... my last word count was just over 35,000 words I am proud of myself so spending so much time and energy on my story. The work I did makes me feel invigorated to keep going instead of being burned out (as I got the impression from the bloggers). As much I want to keep writing and I spent so much time working away that I didn't give myself much reading time so I for December I now want to find a better balance. AH! it is December! 

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

Writing Wednesday... not much to say

Hello lovely readers,

Usually I love Wednesdays and posting this blog, but I feel I have little to say. Actually that's not true... I have a bit to say. I caught up on my typing, which feels great. My current word count is 78,196 (so about 162 page). So now I have to continue writing!!! I feel comfortable with my outline and I have written a few future scenes (which is also exciting). So I will continue as working on my story I don't know how much I will have to post here.

A couple of months ago I started my retelling of Wives and Daughters through letter writing... I enjoyed writing it as I felt stuck in my writing and it was a good release for my creative energy. However, now I am so busy between my work, other activities to juggle two stories.Also I am thinking about changing my timing of this blog. I might have been a little too ambitious to think I could have a post three times a week and as I have always wanted quality over quantity... I am going to switch to posting Tuesdays and Thursdays (or Friday) and as much as I like alterations I am not going to hold myself that as tightly as I have been. I still want to share the things that are important to me my faith, the events of my days,  my writing and the books I'm reading. Also there will be times I share random YouTube videos and posts of historical dramas. I hope you will stay tuned to my blog... I do so enjoy writing it.

Last weekend I went to Vermont (my first time to Vermont) to see a revival pastor named Clayton Jennings. As I have posted here I have been feeling rather distant in my faith and a good friend of mine invited me to this and it was wonderful. I got such in sight into what God desires for my life. I hope to write about that more. However, I wanted to share this video "Now Is Your Time | Philippians 4:13": 


Even if you aren't a none Christian this is a good reminder that this is our one and only life and if you have a passion or a dream this is the time to do it. He states "if you want to be an author write that book." However, as a Christian it speaks to the fact this is our time and that nothing is impossible to do what God calls us to do. Do you have a sense of what God has called you to do? 

I know this message can sound like a TV evangelical that talks about how God will bring you wealth, well that is not what Clayton Jennings messages is, I think his message is to tell us to stop dragging our feet and embrace what God has in store for us. To keep being "game changers" for God. Personally I think this is an awesome message because I as a wanna-be-author I have always wondered how I can use my gifts for God... the Bible talks a lot about pastors, evangelicals, and prophets (well  I am not those things). So I didn't know how I fit in to the church... in that I really happy to know I can use my gifts of writing and story telling to spread the good news of God. Is there anything you are passionate about you can use and shape for the message of God? 

That is all for now, but before I close this post I want give a shout out to my bffl on her birthday... I am so lucky to be her Watson. 

Monday, August 10, 2015

My world Monday... my week off.

Hello lovely readers,

I am taking this week off from blogging. I have enjoyed this schedule of getting a post done for three times a week, but to be honest I have felt the drain a bit and I feel that my content has not been that good. While I am trying to push myself in writing more I know I want my content to be good. Also the last couple of Monday's I have not had much to say for "My World Monday" post... I have actually had a few ideas but none very good. I am taking this week off.

Hope you understand.

As the first season of Poldark is now over :( I am obsessing over the fan made videos. I really like this one, below, hope you enjoy.

Monday, June 29, 2015

Can't Just Sit By

Hello lovely readers,

I have had a few thoughts on my mind about this weeks "My World Monday" and I want to let you know what's going on in my life but before I start I want to say "thank you" to you guys my readers. I know I have gone back and forth on this blog from posting a lot to not posting at all. I know I have changed my mind on the focus of this blog a few times and I have probably left you wondering "what is going on in her head" so thank you for staying with me through all my transitions.

Second I want to say that as much as I love this blog... it is going through more transitions. I want this blog to feel comfortable and personal. For people who know me in real life I want this blog to sound genuine and true (I don't want this blog to be a false persona). For the people who don't know me in real life I want you to feel connected. I am trying to blog about the truths in my life from the highs to the lows and all the in between. One transition you might notice is that I am trying to set up a blogging schedule (Monday, Wednesday, and Friday). I am not a professional blogger so I am sure I will miss some days but I hope you guys will stick with me. Another transition I am trying to make is getting my blog more professional (at least in looks). There a few blogs I follow closely and I would love to have more their style, but I still want this blog to be comfortable.
I don't know why but for some reason I picture a big comfy reading chair when I think about how I want this blog to feel. So I will still be posting about my faith, my obsession with period dramas, my writing, the books I am reading and other various things I enjoy. But I have added advertisement to this blog in hopes of getting a little bit of money while doing something I enjoy. There might be some other changes a long the way but as I am not a professional blogger it might come in bits and pieces.

Third, I want to say "I am sorry". I feel sometimes I hide behind my books, my stories that I am writing and even this blog to hide what is really going on in my life and in my heart.

I think I hide because it is easier to share only part of the truth, the truth I like, than to share some things that hurt me to write out. But a blog seems safe, minus a few people I know who read my blog for the most part my readers are anonymous. So in that way I feel I can express myself better with you my readers than sometimes my own friends. But in other ways I can't... I know many readers are anonymous and we will most likely never meet but I still hold myself back because I fear judgement. I fear that if I say to much you may not like what I say and stop reading. I fear that if I speak out for things I believe in I will be called a hypocrite.

I have made mistakes, I have held grudges and I admit I let those grudge fester inside me that they have turned to hate. And I feel like a hypocrite in that way because I claim to love God and Jesus and the Bible talks endlessly about loving people. Yet somehow dislike and bitterness are easier for me than love. I love my family and my friends but the Bible says "love your neighbor as yourself" and I fail miserably at this. So I am sorry.

My church has been doing a series called "Forward" about the story we are moving forward with our money, in our families and in our community. As much as I pretend on the outside to be fine, I know with my thoughts and actions I am not moving the Good News forward.

One thing I have noticed in both my prayer time and in this blog is I talk a lot about changing and doing things but I don't really move towards change. So I can't just sit back, I can't just hide behind my books, or my stories anymore. If I want to change things I am going to have to get going. So this will probably be the biggest transition this blog and my life will be going through. For example: I can't just say I want to be a writer I have to actually get writing. And I can't just say I want to make an impact on this world and do nothing. So the first thing I am going to do is make to get invested in my community around me (not sure exactly what that means but I am keeping my eyes open). 

So I can't just sit by anymore... I hope you will stay with me as I go through this journey.

Friday, February 20, 2015

The Secret of our Days Past... New Blog

Hello Lovely Readers, 

During the last few days I have been working on setting up another blog to exclusively share my story. I feel like I have had a bolt of lighting strike when it comes to the plot of my story and it has been hard to think of anything else. I hope this bolt of lighting will lead to some more writing, typing, and sharing. In the mean time I have a lot of my story to share. 

Here is the link of my other blog: The Secret of our Days Past.

It is still a work in progress but the layout are how I want them so I thought I would make it public. Hope you enjoy, 
-Blaire 

Friday, September 12, 2014

"Busy Nothings"

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I love Period Dramas and I am so happy to find so many bloggers have a love for them too... probably my favorite thing about blog is that you can find a little community of other people who love the same things as you do.

Anyway, I was inspired by Miss Dashwood's post title "A Quick Succession of Busy Nothings" a line from Jane Austen's Mansfield Park. It seemed to be a fun way to tell her readers what is happening in her life. She said in her post that she doesn't update her readers much on what is happening with her life... Well that is not the same for me as for the most part I use this blog as an online journal but I liked her format so I am coping it. Though I have to change some of the topics as I don't sow or act.

So here we go my "Busy Nothings"...

~~Reading As school is starting I decided to end my "Summer Reading" list, but this does not mean I have stopped reading. I am currently reading two books (usually something I can't do well). One is The Great Divorce by C.S. Lewis. And The Winding Road by Cynthia Harrod Eagles. This is apart of her Morland Dynasty series that have become addicted at least the ones about the Edwardian time period and WWI. This book is about 1920's and all the flash of the Jazz Age.
My favorite book of hers
Full of great descriptions of Edwardian Society
~~Listening I listen to a great a variety of things from Country (as long as its not to twangy), folk, some pop, musicals, and Christian. But lately I have been enjoying Mumford and Sons, All the Sons and Daughters, for King and Country, and Mercy Me. But my go to song has been "Arms" by Christina Perri. I fell in love with it when I saw a fan made video of Parks and Rec music video set to that song.
I know I have featured this video before but I still love it.

~~Decorating As I have said a lot on this blog... I have moved into my new apartment. And I am happy to say I feel very settled into this new place. Also I have wall in the living room that is very much my fashion wall. Fortunately my roommate and I have very similar taste or she doesn't mind my obsession with vintage fashion.
My wall
I am also going through and "re-decorating" my blog. I have changed the background and I have taken down my "good reads" section on the side and replaced it with some quotes. I had those "good read" books up for close to 2 years and I thought it was just time to mix things up...don't want this blog to get stale. Might do some other changes but essence of this blog will be the same.

~~Painting I have never been a big person to paint my nails... at least, it seemed like a hassle and painting my right hand looked like the work of Jackson Pollack. But after my friend's wedding, my nails looked so pretty I have tried to make more of an effort painting them.
Picture of Bridal party
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Probably my favorite picture of the night... not because I am in the front
but because it was such a cute moment.
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~~Watching probably too much TV. My new roommate has awesome cable... I haven't had this much cable since my dorm years and I must say it is addicting. Today I discovered Boy Meets World has reruns on MTV2.
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~~Working work is work not much changes but I am trying to get my mind wrapped around the idea of finishing school and entering the "real world." Still not sure if library science is truly what I want to pursue... but right now I need to just focus on finishing school. Until I do enter the "real world" I am going to enjoy days to sleep in and naps.

~~Anticipating There is currently a lot I am anticipating... being done with Grad School (though that comes with a lot of angst as well as some good things). Lots of people look forward to fall but I am just enough as a pessimist to know fall means winter is coming and I hate winter (it last way too long) but I am looking forward to Pumpkin flavors everywhere. I think the one thing I am looking forward the most is my sister having another little nugget.
This was their announcement
I love being Aunt Blaire and so far my sister and brother-in-law have made cute kids so I am totally excited for this little one to come a long. 

~~Writing the answer should be obvious... my thesis, But as the next topic is "Studying" I will say I am writing my story The Grand Days (working title). I am doing a mix of both writing it and typing it up. I have never been one to stare at a blank screen and write creatively so I always have to hand write my stories. Then as they progress I start to type them up.

~~Studying As I have stated a few times. This semester I am writing my thesis. So I am learning a lot about working women's lives and their fashion at the turn of the 20th century. I am hoping to see how this liberated women before they got the vote. I wrote an undergraduate thesis and for that I wrote about the antebellum movement to get rid of the corset...which as you know was not successful. I was kind of hoping in this time I would find women throwing out their corsets but I haven't found much literature on that. But I have found a lot of literature on more and more women being in control of their own money and therefore found more freedom that way... that might be my approach.
A classic picture of a clerical worker

~~Reminders I love motivational quotes so I have a rather large pinterest board on them... but its probably time for me to start reading them
-John Green
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Monday, July 7, 2014

Inspiration Strikes

Or a phone with a "note pad"
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I follow a blog called Inkwell Inspirations that mainly has the focus for Christian writers. It is a great blog to read  in order to remember to combine my faith and my passion for writing. In a recent post they discuss the idea of being a "The Subconscious Writer." She explains this: "Because so much of my creative process takes place on a level even I do not understand. Ideas percolate under the surface, maybe for weeks, maybe for months, maybe for years. At some point they burst out like a geyser. Characters are talking to me, scenes unfolding in my head, worlds evolving, and I’m frantically trying to get them down on paper before I lose them. I’m sure if push came to shove, I could sit down and come up with an idea and craft a book like a normal person, but that’s not the way I typically do it, and it’s not the way I desire to do it."
I feel this is totally true of me. For example I was walking to my dentist I saw these houses and I thought they were beautiful and all the sudden a scene came to me... it is not a scene for the story I am currently working on... it just came out of no where. I took out my phone and pulled out my "notepad" on the phone and began to type. I love when scenes like this come to me it makes my walk abouts more interesting. She ends the post saying "In the end, being a “subconscious writer” isn’t the goal. It’s just the process. The ultimate goal, whether pantser or plotter, is to be led by the Holy Spirit and allow him to flow through every word we put on the page. This is how to write with a godly passion that will cause our readers to fall in love with our stories and transform them from the inside out." 

I agree with this... I don't always want to be a subconscious writer one day I would love my faith to be more and more about of my writing but you got to start somewhere, right?



Here is the scene...

It was a great big Victorian home with intrinsic molding, a minimum of two bay windows, and high pointed roofs. Built in the last decade of the nineteenth century in the heyday of the golden age. While it was all posh and prestige on the outside, it was Ginny Camden grandma's house. The house was filled of memories of her playing dress up and Essie (as Ginny called her Grandma) reading to her the books of Little House on the Prairie and Anne of Green Gables late into the night. She had memories of her summers spent there, she got her first kiss there from Lawrence (who she had a crush on all summer mostly because she was going through a Little Women phase and he not only had the name but had a slight resemblance of a young Christian Bale). In later years Ginny felt Essie was the only one who understood her, in years as a teenager when her parents fought non stop Essie's home was a place comfort. Today was not a day of joy.

Ginny rested her heads against her knees that she had close to her chest. She could still smell the dye in her new black dress. 

"There you are," her mom found her buried in Essie's closet. "I think you should come out and see some people, there are a lot of people who want to see you."

Ginny just shook her head. 

"Some of your friends are here. And lots of food."

Food? How was that suppose to comfort her? No one cooked as well as Essie. 

"Please Genevieve."

She didn't know how she was suppose to get up she could barely stand. Everything about this day felt wrong. This house would not feel the same without Essie sitting at the kitchen table that could look out to the street. 

Ginny just shook her head. 

"Alright Ginny, take your time."

"She's not up to coming out yet," she heard her mom say.

"God bless her soul," a woman's voice responded.

God? Where was God in this? Essie had always been a true believer attending church every Sunday morning and evening, and Bible study on Wednesday nights. If she hadn't gone out that Sunday night she would still be here. God could have protected her. Essie was always going on about how God was a great protector but He didn't protect her that night. God was obviously not there

Ginny closed her grasp around the cross necklace hanging around her neck, she wanted to yank it off, but no strength came. Essie had given her this cross on her last birthday with the inscription "Always love" on the back.
~~~~~~
Okay I didn't write all that on my walk but it just started coming to me. I really want to see where this story goes.

Saturday, July 20, 2013

Google knows me so well



I love my blog... I love that Google thinks related searches are Jane Austen, Writing Romance, Pride and Prejudice, Romance Fiction, Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen (incase you thought P&P was by someone else) and other things. I guess Google knows me well.

Wednesday, July 3, 2013

ssshhh part 2

Hello readers,

For some reason blog spot is working on Internet Explorer but not on Chrome... what? So good news I can post from home. I am just surprised that I cannot get it to work from Chrome. Oh well at least it works some place so I can continue this blog.

I just passed 300 post! So time for some blogging celebration.

Thank you loyal readers who have been around since post #1.

Just good for celebration!

Tuesday, July 2, 2013

sssshhhh

Screen shot from "I Capture the Castle"
Dear Readers,

I am having trouble with blog spot and composing a post on my computer at home but somehow it is working fine on my work computer. For a bit last night I thought of switching over to Wordpress... but I couldn't get it to feel the same as this blog. I have grown emotionally attached to this blog. So I decided to write at home copy and paste them when I am at work. It should not take me that much time to do the copy and pasting it here (in my composing area) and I am blessed with a job that has slow moments.

Maybe with all that is going on in my life, I should take the sign of blog spot not working as a sign and focus on other things besides this blog. But I come to this blog as a release. I feel better after writing my little nothings and I don't know if I could get through my days without this blog. As I said I have an emotional attachment to this blog.

So I will have to be working on this blog under cover (as much as you can do under cover online).

-Blaire

Saturday, June 29, 2013

Dancing through research

I wrote in my post "I do not have a post for today" that I would like to learn more about Edwardian dancing. As much as I love Downton Abbey I feel like it is missing dancing... minus one very important scene in season 2. (If you watch Dowton you know instantly what I am talking about but I love posting pictures of Downton and Dan Stevens.)
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Any way after writing that post I remembered a very helpful resource, Edwardian Promenade, I have used it to find great pictures but it is quite insightful on Edwardian life. So I thought I would take a shot and see what it had on dancing. And I found a very interesting article with a few YouTube videos to give examples. For example...

You might recognize "The Grizzly Bear" from Season 1 of Downton Abbey
 as Thomas and Daisy do a bit of it. 

I know not all my readers are as interested in Edwardian dancing as I am, but I think in writing one should be a truthful as possible even if the story is completely made up it is in the details that matter. One of my favorite authors (besides Jane Austen) is Jennifer Donnelly and I feel she must spend so much time doing research to get the details so accurate, I am impressed. I have always loved historical fiction for this reason because the elements have to be precise for them to be believable but yet the writer can sweep you away in to a world and time we can only imagine about. I know that is why I personally am drawn to historical fiction, the indulgence to escape into another life. 

I hope I can write my character a good dance scene... I feel sometimes when watching people dance you can see their true feelings... Just think what Emma would be with out the ball when you finally see Mr. Knightley admits his feelings (at least to the audience). 
Mr. Knightley: Who are you going to dance with?
Emma: You if you should ask me. After all we are not brother and sister.
Mr. Knightley: Brother and sister.... indeed we are not. 
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So if you are like me and trying to write some historical fiction, I recommend reading history (rather on a blog or in a book), watching period dramas (from a time period you love), and reading other historical novels. I know it may not be official history but I have fallen in love with this series called the Morland Dynasty by Cynthia Harrod-Eagles. It starts in pre-Elizabethian era but goes up to the 1920's as this family evolves through time. I  read The Dream Kingdom going from 1909-1912 and I am reading now The Restless Sea about the Titanic and I look forward to going to reading the books about WWI. While I was reading The Dream Kingdom, I underlined lots of text that described society, to the food they ate, to the dresses they wore. I loved it and have gone back to it in writing my own story. 

Okay this post has gotten longer than I thought, so I will leave you with this last photo... 
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Couldn't resist one more Downton Abbey photo. 

Wishing you the best in your writing.

Monday, June 10, 2013

A naive writer's sentiments


One of the many blogs I follow is Scribble Chicks. It is written by 4 women who blog about being a writer. I find it very amusing. Well in Monday's post Confession they wrote:

MYTH: You can tell you are supposed to be or are a writer because you cannot imagine living life without writing and you don't enjoy the time when you aren't writing.

They explained this as a myth because...

TRUTH: There are definitely times when I greatly dislike writing. Usually it's when my deadline is creeping up on me and I have gotten myself backed into a wall in my story. There are often times during breaks in deadlines when I really wonder if I have another book in me. Or after I've gotten a contract when I stare at a blank Word document and I can't for the life of me figure out a good opening scene.


To read more click here 


I know right now I am just an aspiring author with this blog and some poems I got published my high school literary magazine as my only publishing credits. So I know I do not feel the pressure of a deadline on me... though I will say I do try to publish here once every 2 days. Though I write frequently in between to prepare for up coming post. And I know I have never gotten a contract so I can't go against their truths but I do question their myths.

Over my trip with my mom I told her even though I am in grad school for Library Science, I long to be a writer and I think the reason I gave was much the same as the myth. When I can't fun write thanks to school it is hard and I long to write again. Then when I can write, thanks to summer or long snow storms, I feel like writing is the only thing I should be doing. Rather it be this blog, my journal, or my story I love seeing my thoughts on paper. Sometimes writing is the only thing that makes sense in my life and in my stories I can escape and make sense of things. Maybe in my naive sense I feel like that is why people enter the world of writing.

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I am still thinking over this myth. Maybe if I ever truly become a published author I will understand the pressure of a deadline. Right now in my writing I have finished my story The Sisters of Pine Haven and have sent it to my mom, my current editor, to read over. In the fall I have to write my Master's thesis so I don't think I will get back to it until after that. Now I am just trying to work on my story, Rose Gray, as much as possible. Then with two stories under my belt and having finished Grad-school I might feel like seeking publication. Right now I still believe this...

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Yeah my thoughts might be naive but I am hoping I will always love to write as it has been such a comfort all these years.

More from a naive writer:
posted: June, 2012

If you a published author I would love to hear your thoughts on this. 

Sunday, June 9, 2013

I got Tumblr

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I love collecting pretty pictures hence my addiction to Pinterest and through that I have found lots of Tumblrs that have pictures I like. I know not every one that reads my blog cares to look at pictures from Downton Abbey, Jane Austen, or other things old fashion. So I am using my tumblr to collect and share those pictures. So if you want to see some pictures I love click here for my link to Liblairian's Pics Tumblr. I am still new to Tumblr so if you have any advice let me know.

Example of the awesomeness I have found on Tumblr:
100 Years of Dance.

Monday, February 4, 2013

Note to readers

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Dear Readers,

I don't know who is actually reading my blog... but I am changing it. I have decided to write fictitious letters to a girl name Anne whenever I want to write about my life. I do not know why I decided to name my character Anne. But I have decided I have wanted to change my blog around a bit so now all my "Dear Readers" post I will write write to this Anne character. In some ways it seems more personal. I don't know if this makes sense but last night instead of falling asleep I was thinking about this blog and how I want to make it more personal more about my life and not just fluff (as I feel it has become). As I was thinking about it an idea came to my head that I should write these as letters. I have tried to be a pen pal once and I love the idea of writing long handed letters but it didn't last long. So I want to write letters. But instead of writing letters to this unknown group of readers(as I am not exactly sure who reads this) I decided to name my readers Anne. I don't think actually know any person named Anne so I am not writing to anyone in particular.

Hope you enjoy the letters,
Blaire

My first letter to Anne {click here}

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Blogging Break

I have loved this picture for so long I am glad to use it
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Hey lovely Readers,

My mind is having sort of mental block so instead of writing some post that are not good quality I am taking a little break from blogging right now. I feel like I am a little burnt out from all the commitments I have and some other personal things going on that I can't really think of something to write about. I think taking a little break from blogging is the best thing for me.

I will keep working on my story and updating the parts I have typed up. But I think right now I just need some time to write my story and make that the prime focus of my free time.  To follow my story click here... Sisters of Pine Haven.


Thanks for your understanding,

Blaire

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Things I'm afraid to tell you

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The idea for this post was originally inspired by this blogging trend that went around a few weeks ago. I found it through one of my favorite bloggers Sarah at Well and Cheaply  she found it through another blogger Creature Comforts the idea behind these post are for bloggers to become more vulnerable "in an effort to make the bigger blogging community a better place" to read more click here.  I started writing this post but I felt like all I was doing was whining so I never published it. But now I am more inspired by a series my church is doing called Undone for those messages click here. I have been thinking lately a lot about things that have been holding me back in my life and in my faith. On Monday after my quiet time I wrote this poem... it is still in its infancy phase but I wanted to share it.*

I hear a voice
I know it well
   it tells me over and over
I am unworthy
I am unable to be loved
and when I look in the mirror
   it tells me 
I am ugly.

This voice is closer to me
   than a friend
and been around me 
   since I was a little girl. 

I hide my face 
   admit defeat
and walk with shame.

I hope no one else 
  can see these failings
I hope today my mask
  of goodness stays in place. 

When I am strong
   I pick myself up
and tell the voice "no"
  I am worthy
  I am loved
  and I will prove it. 
So I do my best
   on my own 
   to fight against it
   but I fail.

I hear the voice
I know it well.
It mocks me for trying
it points out my scars
   and my pain
it points out the wrongs 
   I commit 
   and how I will always keep failing.
Because of these
it tells me over and over 
I am unworthy 
I am unable to be loved 
and when I look in the mirror
    it tells me
I am ugly.

So I continue with my mask 
    of goodness 
always adjusting it 
so people see 
what they want to see. 

They see a smile
   and that's what I want
because who loves a girl 
   who curls up in bed and cries
who loves a girl that is 
   falling apart
   lonely,
   and scared. 

They see a smile
   and that's what I want. 
But I hear a voice 
    and I know it well
a voice that is quick to cut
a voice that is louder than all others 
and a voice I would die to silence.

I hear it
bury my head in shame
admit defeat
and curl up in a dark spot.

There I sit
but there I hear a whisper 
it is very soft
"my child", "my love"
"my beauty", "my creation."

"You must have me wrong"
I tell the whisper.

But it repeats
"my child", "my love"
"my beauty", "my creation."
I open my eyes
see nothing there
so I doubt its existence.
"My child","my love"
"I am here for you
in darkness to be your light,
to be your hope
when you feel hopeless,
and to be your strength 
when you can't pick yourself up.
Remain in me 
and I will remain in you."

When I cling to that whisper 
the voice softens 
when I concentrate on that whisper
the shame of my failings 
    go away
and when I take in that whisper 
I feel blessed and loved.

But the voice is always there
always quick to cut
and some times louder 
   than a battle cry.
But so is the whisper
it remains too.
I have to listen harder
  to hear it 
  but it is there
it calls to me over and over again.
"My child", "my love"
"my beauty", "my creation"
"I am here for you
I am here with you
   and I love you." 

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* to my mom I know you read my post sometimes and worry about me please don't worry I am clinging to the whisper.

Friday, May 18, 2012

Friday's Feature...


My favorite blogger Soundtrack to I do  had a great post last week in which she writes a letter to her future boyfriend/husband that I really loved so I wanted to direct your attention to it.


Dear Mr. Someday,
Since you are a male, and I am a female, there is one thing I know for sure: I am going to confuse you sometimes. Probably a lot. So, I thought I’d give you some pointers, now, ahead of time, to help a brother out. Because it would probably be pretty annoying if I was giving you pointers once we were dating. Plus I won’t want to, because I’m going to want you to magically know how to deal with treat me. Amiright, ladies? Oh sorry Mr. Someday, back to you. So, here’s my list of handy dandy tips, which I may casually print and leave lying around somewhere for you to find one day, when you’re mine. (These are not in order of importance, or any order at all, really.)
to read more click here.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Happy 200!

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One of my goals for this blog was to keep celebrating little triumphs. Today I am happy to announce I have written 200 post. I wrote my Happy 100th post, November 30th so I am excited how fast it took me to write another 100 post. I hope you have enjoyed this journey.
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Time to Celebrate!!!
Since my 100th post I have had some blogging celebrations...
1. I have gotten lots of writing done on my story the Sisters of Pine Haven... In my post Winter Break  I wrote that I wanted to write more of my story. I stated in that post I only had 9 post of my story, now I have 22 post.
2. I got a twitter account you can now follow me @liblairian I post updates on blog and things in my life.

3. I had my blog redesigned thanks to Annie from Wattlebird 
4. I am happy to say I had two wonderful guest bloggers on this blog. 

Kimberly from "Here's what I think about" 

Laura from "Girl Plus Everything Else"
What did you want to be when you grew up

5. I also wrote 2 guest blogs for their blogs. My Journey Through Reading and inspired by Laura's post on growing up I wrote about all my dream jobs that I had while I was growing up

6. My post "A Sunday of nonproductive-ness" has been looked at 143 times, that is huge for me. 

Some personal celebrations 
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I left my full time job in January so I can go to school full time. It has been great to have the time to focus on school and it is nice to have days off. It is so nice not going from working all day to doing home work all night.
Also I during my spring break I went to see my sister and my niece. It was a wonderful trip and great time to bond with my niece. She calls me "Ah ba" because she can't say Aunt Blaire yet. I don't know if I actually want her to call me Aunt Blaire because I love the way she says my name. I have gotten bit homesick since being back in Boston so I have skyped with her a few times. 
My niece and I 
I know I spend a lot of time dreaming about the future and eagerly awaiting what the future has to offer but I am more and more loving the day for what it is and not always what I hope it will be. I admit some times it is harder than I would like but I can't keep waiting for the future, because after all the future is only what I make of it today.