Building barns

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On Wednesday night my bible study and I discussed the verses Luke 12:13-21 it is called the "Parable of the Rich Fool" and in the story the "rich man" has so many crops can't store them all so he decides to tear down his barnes and build new ones. God then calls him out and says "you fool tonight your life will be demanded from you, then who will inherit this." While it is good to work hard, this man seems to only thinks about himself and how he is going to benefit from his work. Growing up in the church I have heard this story a lot. One time I heard a pastor say that if this man had been connected with his community he would have given his extra crop to the poor and would not have stored it up. And while these moral stories are good sometimes they are hard to sink in and after hearing the story a lot it is even harder for the story to make an impact. But then my friend said something to the group... he said "in our own way we all build barnes, we all think, oh if I could just get married, or if I could just have a kid, or if I could just __(fill in the blank)_then it will be just righ" but will it be just right? And how long do we have to we keep striving for "just right"; one day God will call us home and then we won't have time to do all the the things we should have done or we won't have time to do what is most important to us and the world. Sorry not trying to be a Debby Downer.

I just know I fall into the trap of thinking "when I get married or when I have kids my life is going to be all set." I remember with my only serious boyfriend that once we got married everything would be fine, I saw marriage as a finish line, not a start line. Any one who is married knows that. So I will admit foolishly I have been building up my barnes waiting for the day when I become a wife and mother. I enjoy being single, doing whatever I want (within reason) being on my own time schedule and not to sound bad but being a little selfish. But their are times I spend  a lot of time and energy waiting for "my dream" to come true. And sadly I think I sometimes miss out on the great time I am in.

I can't do everything I want to do right now because I am kind of stuck in grad school for the next two years. So maybe right now all I can do is build some potential barnes as I wait for the "real world" but I shouldn't pass up on opprotunities that I can take advantage of. For example this summer I am hoping to go down to Honduras and dig wells with living water. But after grad school I would actually love to take some time work on staff with Living Water, so I can go to Africa or India  with them. But after my trip to Denver, I kind of want to move there so I can be closer to my sister and her growing family. (I am of course still praying about these things).

Basically, we only get one life and we can't waste time waitng for things to be just right.