Pin of the week

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During some random Tumblr time I found this picture from John Green's Hipster Tumblr. I saw it and instantly thought of the verse John 16:33-

 

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

 

No ryme or reason... just love

Hello lovely readers,

I have posted some deep blog post so to lighten the mood I thought I would post this cheesy period drama montage video. I am kind of a closet "fan-video loving girl". When I fall in love with a movie, or TV show I love seeking out these fan-video music videos. I am going to say it is my hopeful romantic side that still wants to hold on to the story and not let it go, however it is probably just my geeky side.  

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It is funny as much as I love the love stories, I am more and more starting to appreciate the hero or heroine's journey(as the case may be). I have given my friend some books of mine to read and she gotten annoyed at me because the last few I have given her (I capture the Castle and A Northern Light) do not have the typical romantic ending. In fact the heroine leaves the "hero" of the story to have a very independent life. She thinks it is odd that I have such strong hopeful romantic feelings. I told her "I am giving her heroines that are strong that settle for nothing but the best in life." I have a very deep heart for love and sappiness but I think the only way to have true love is not to settle for anything but perfection. I know love will not be perfect (I am not expecting a Disney movie), I know it is hard work, but I also know that love should not feel like settling. I can watch sappy movies but at the end of the day the love stories I admire are the ones where the characters grow and empower themselves. So I am still on the look out for these heroines...

Some I highly recommend (highly bias but in no particular order)
Cassandra- I Capture the Castle
Molly Gibson- Wives and Daughters
Elinor Dashwood- Sense and Sensibility
Amy Dorrit- Little Dorrit
Fiona- The Tea Rose
Hadassah- A Voice in the Wind and Echo in the Darkness
Shelby Parker- The Princess
Mattie- A Northern Light
Fanny Price- Mansfield Park

Cassandra from I Capture the Castle
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Holding onto Truths pt. 2

Hello,

 

When I posted my Holding onto Truths  I wrote that I needed to add a part 2... First I am rather surprised how many people have read that post and my Life Update post. Let me go back and explain a few things, halfway through writing my "Holding onto Truths" post was when I was having trouble with my blogging on my home computer, so I didn't write it all together. That was probably good because I feel like I was kind of throwing myself a pity party, then once I postponed my thesis I felt like the cloud that had been hanging over me was gone and I felt much more relief. I actually felt like deleting that post, but then I felt that would be as if I was pretending that I never had those doubts or concerns and I want to be honest with you my readers. I feel like today so much of social media is concerned with showing only our best side, but this blog is not only for my best it is also to help work through my worst. So I posted the post and I hope if you are feeling doubts, and insecurities, that you will read that post and know you are not alone.

 

After posting "Holding onto Truth" post my mom called, she so wishes she could fix all my problems. I told her "at least I know these are lies." I think we hold onto lie because it is the devils way of keeping us from God. I honestly believe the verses that God created us in His image, to be his masterpiece, but if the devil can slip doubt into that, then he can separate us from God and separate us from doing the work God wants us to do. I will be the first one to admit sometimes the voices of doubt, insecurities, pain, regret, shame, and others cab scream louder than God's whisper of peace, beauty, hope, love and truth. I know the feelings of being surrounded by those voices, feeling lost in the woods and not knowing a way out, or feeling you have sunk to the bottom of the ocean and see no life preserver. I know those feelings but I also know God's truth. 

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Somewhat related post:

Things I am afraid to tell you

No fight left

Not forsaken and part 2 

Discovering my mountain 

Hope is in the act of Waiting

I am still struggling with it. I know God is present in my life but right now I can't feel Him. I am sticking to my quiet times but they are more like a to do list than an experience. I am hoping now that I have postponed my thesis and the cloud has lifted I can get real and honest with God. Its funny God knows everything, He knows the desires of my heart, He knows all my bruises, all the pain I carry around pointlessly and yet sometimes I feel I can hide from Him. Right now I don't want to hide from any more. I know I have issues but I think the only way to move on is to open my heart to God, truly open my heart, hand over the pain and tears and let Him be in the moment. I told Him, the other day in prayer, that get glimmers of His goodness but I don't want to just settle for moments of it. I want it to be fully in my life. 

It is interesting that in my community groups we were talking about Romans 12 and my friend asked us which one of the following in the "Love in Action" part is hardest for us. I said "12:12, because I have felt like beaten down, at a loss, and not knowing where to go in my faith. I have felt passionless in my faith, and I have felt for awhile sometimes I am just going through the motions." I have had moments of passion but they are short and far between. I am longing for a moment of His glory and my passion. 

9 Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. 10 Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. 11 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. 12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. 13 Share with the Lord’s people who are in need.Practice hospitality.

In my last post Music for my soul I wrote the truths I am holding on to:

• I know God is present in my life even if I am not feeling Him right now.
• I know God wants only the best in my life, so while this is just a phase, it is not forever.
• I know God loves me and will not let go of me.  

I don't really have a conclusion to this post but I felt I left my "Holding onto Truth" post on such a low note that I wanted to let you, my readers, know that in my heart I know the doubts and insecurities are lies and I trying very hard to cling to God's truth. 

Thank you for reading,

Blaire

 

Some good finds on Pinterest:

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Music for my soul

Hello lovely readers,

I have been posting a lot of songs lately. It is amazing to me I will just be listening to my spotify playlist and songs I selected months ago are still so powerful to me. This is one of those songs. From my Dear Anne letters, I think you tell I have been going through a hard time in my faith so the words of the song are very true for my present.

 

Truths I am holding onto in my life:

I know God is present in my life even if I am not feeling Him right now.

I know God wants only the best in my life, so while this is just a phase, it is not forever.

I know God loves me and will not let go of me.  

 

Song: Silence

By: Joy Williams

Are you listening
TO anything that I say
'Cause I been praying
How many prayers can I pray
I'm still waiting
Maybe You'll show up today

I know You're here, but I can't feel You
And if You're speaking, I can't hear You
How much longer will this last

Chorus:
So okay Answer me with silence
It's okay if You don't say a word
You're testing me to trust You'll be faithful in this quiet
So okay
Answer me
With silence

Why do I question
Your intentions for me
When Your affection
Is a proven legacy

Oh Father, Father
Turn my fears into peace
I know Your love will never leave
I know You want what's best for me

You're testing me to trust You'll be faithful in this quiet

Oh, it's okay
If You answer me with silence
And it's okay if You don't say a word
You're testing me to trust You'll be faithful in this quiet
So okay
Answer me
With silence