It is amazing what 24 hours can do, or in this case one email can do....
As some of you might know I am getting my duel master's in Library Science and History. Well one large part of getting the History degree is writing a thesis. I did an under-grad thesis so I thought this would not be much different but it has felt completely different and overwhelming. So overwhelming that I was mentally paralyzed and it was like a cloud hanging over me. I had a plan to do my research over the summer and then come September hit the ground running with writing. Well that would have been good except for 2 things. One I was purely exhausted after last semester that I procrastinated working on my thesis proposal and then rushed to get in for the deadline, I will admit it was not my best work. Then when I sat down with a potential thesis advisor she had a lot of concerns over my thesis it really left me questioning what I wanted to, and I felt completely drained. I have since that meeting sunk away not even wanting to touch my books and I have felt passionless. I have even thought about dropping out of school because I was so uncertain about what I wanted to do. So after I had some hard conversations with my parents I thought about postponing writing my thesis.
Today the thesis councilor emailed me and asked me about my progress and I responded...
I have been thinking it over and wondering if my topic is truly what I want to write about. I have also been wondering if I could possibly not do the class this Fall and do it in the Spring of 2014? I know was "professor" concerned I would be spending all Fall researching and not getting it completed before December. I feel I need more time going over secondary resources and through that figuring out the more if this is really the path I want to take, or what aspect more precisely I want to focus on.
I think it sounds like a good and sane plan to take the fall to do the preliminary research and secondary reading, and then to take the thesis writers' course in the spring. I suspect you will be happier writing your thesis when you have a stronger sense of the sources you will use and the questions you want to ask. This strikes me as a responsible decision.
It is amazing I feel such a relief. So I will not be graduating in December as I thought but in May, which I am totally okay with. I'd rather take my time and do good work than feel rushed and overwhelmed.
In the Fall I will be doing my internship and taking a children's librarian class. The children's librarian class is not apart of my track just something I am interested in and it will be good to see if this is another path.
Sorry if this all doesn't make sense, I am just happy to lessen my mental plate. I know this summer I just want to read novels and get some fun writing in.
I will keep you posted on all sorts of progress and changes in my life.